Well its Monday, I say this after a pretty horrendous weekend dealing with a bunch of very nasty Wikipedia editors who have both blanked all credible information about me and replaced it with one source of criticism by a woman who withheld relevant qualifications when writing an article about me. This is totally against the principles of Wikipedia and also makes you realise how dangerous individuals with a little bit of power can be.

Two enormously positive things have occurred during this experience. Firstly, I have received the most amazing messages of support from my twitter family; I genuinely have few words that can express the love I have been offered. Every message I have received has eased the stress a little and reinforced the genuine love I have for the majority of human beings.

Often people are surprised that I respond to all my twitter messages, for me however I remain consistently amazed that people care enough to share a point of view with me, me returning an opinion, sentiment or daft picture is the least I can do.

Secondly watching my partner spend his entire weekend fighting with this group of individuals, tirelessly and without complaint; watching him sit frustrated and sad at the computer where he was repeatedly blocked and threatened and generally treated with complete disrespect made me feel so unbelievably blessed. 

You see that’s what really counts in life; belongingness.

I could have gone through this experience feeling wounded, harmed and bullied (as was this group of individuals intent), but instead I feel invigorated, enthusiastic about human kindness and genuinely warmed by the people I know as my friends both on and off the web.

I will get the Wikipedia page sorted as it’s a distorted and biased perspective which is against the rules, (not that the editors in question follow any themselves). I have contacted lawyers regarding an individual who made libellous comments, (this is already being dealt with) and I will continue in spite of their lies to work in the media on and off screen as a Psychologist, so stick that in your pipe and smoke it Wikipedia police!

Today I have seen three clients already and every one of them has reminded me of what really matters, my therapeutic ability, kindness and common decency.

Finally to all of you who took the time to fight my corner and to show me support, I hope you recognise the power of those 140 characters on Twitter, they really did mean the world.

A million kind wishes to you all x

 

So , I've finally managed to get back around to writing my blog. Its been an interesting couple of days, toing and froing with Wikipedia as regards changes an individual made to an article on there about my credentials. In spite of offering all my qualifications - along with my registration number approved by the Professional Standards Authority for Health and Social Care within the 'Psychological Therapies,' my BACP registration and many sources to validate my work these were persistently removed. In fact the only one that remained was an article that noted me as a 'pop Psychologist!'
The internet is a powerful tool and in that hands of nasty people can cause immense distress.
I have always been transparent about my qualifications, I am not a Phd (in spite of the Director of the Manchester Counselling Psychology Phd, where I lecture a couple of times a year consistently nudging me to do one), I have never felt that I needed to.
I love my work in therapy and I am very highly qualified. I am also employed as a private Psychologist and employed on screen as one.
What is my crime? Well yes, I haven't committed one, in fact I am totally transparent in my work.
The fact that an individual in Australia decided that they didn't agree with me using my legally entitled title 'Psychologist' led to what has been a couple of the most frustrating and upsetting days of my recent years.
My wonderful P.A and partner immediately contacted Wikapedia to explain that so far as we considered our page had been hacked and that libellous (thanks brother of mine who is a qualified Barrister) information including suggesting i was a 'self proclaimed psychologist' with no qualifications and an Entrepreneur (which I really wish I was) had been maliciously posted.
Well that was a mistake! Immediately my partner was attacked and told that he was in the wrong for using these terms (remember, we know nothing about the etiquette of Wikapedia and were on the 'talk' to ask for help after genuinely believing that libellous and malicious content was being posted)
What began as us believing someone would look and note that this was the case, turned into my partner staying up all night trying to put the correct info on the site; which was immediately removed and replaced by one damming article by a woman called Margaret McCartney, a G.P  who was given all my qualifications, only to omit my advanced diploma in Counselling and Masters in Counselling, instead saying i was a 'graduate' of psychology....(which i am by the way, but i have higher degrees too). In fact I am still awaiting a response from her and the BMJ as she needs to amend these facts. Even more odd is that this G.P feels she is an authority on Psychology and wrote about me in a medical journal which has nothing to do with my discipline. Mind you this is the woman who also suggested that smears for cervical cancer were a waste of time (tell that my mother who by the way survived it thanks to a smear at the age of 44).
By the way, at this point in the argument my partner was pulled up for his spelling and punctuation (considering it was at this point 3am in the morning and i was snoring i think he did bloody well).
This argument is  still going on by the way, feel free to look at the history where we offer inordinate amounts of links that counteract the claims, degrees and higher degrees, registration and awarding bodies which are immediately removed.
You see the really scary lesson I have learnt here is that somewhere in Australia, there is a very angry individual who absolutely loathes me. This individual also has a group of other angry individuals who go out of their way to discredit people. These are all editors for Wikapedia, a group of people who should have decorum, honesty and integrity at their core; don't get me wrong, before this, we found some of these individuals beyond helpful and they added vast amounts of info for me.
Also, the very odd individual who spent hours blocking our honest info also exposed my partners details, which is in direct contravention of Wikapedia ethics and also posted his Facebook, sound cloud and twitter accounts.
Whilst I have every intention of dealing with that individual, the point is that for me the event showed how even when you are completely transparent about who you are, what you do, the qualifications that you have, and the registration you can demonstrate, someone with a little bit of power can try to ruin you.
I don't hide anything, the production companies I work for, the clients I am privileged to work with, the corporate brands I help and endorse ALL have my qualifications and all think I am excellent at what I do.
I have written this article because Wikapedia is genuinely a site I fully trusted, I go on it all the time as an information base. To discover that it is controlled at times by fabulous individuals who are genuinely helpful and pleasant; no doubt wanting the company to remain credible, and at other times really nasty people has been a disturbing experience.
So, next time you log on to read about that famous celebrity, or to find out that piece of interesting history, remember anyone can edit Wikapedia ,and in my case a very nasty Australian who chooses to hide and delete the facts.

Thoughts on my new shows!

So shortly I have a couple of new shows out, ‘The Joy of Teenage Sex’ channel 4, and ‘Hot Like Us’ BBC 3.

Whenever I am about to be in a series, I take some time to reflect on my resilience and self esteem, because when the critics get hold you need to be made of stern stuff!

So the Joy of Teenage Sex, well let me first of all say that in an ideal world, young people would wait until they were absolutely ready to have sex; in the real world we know this is not the case.

I thought long and hard about taking this show, I am very much old fashioned in many of my views, I truly believe that young people often feel pressured to make life changing decisions, and I believe there is so much media portraying sexualised images to young people and equating these with success, that undeniably young people will make some less than appropriate choices. I am also a huge advocate of keeping childhood innocent and children young for as long as possible.

In spite of these views, after much debate and an agreement to let me stick to the emotional side of sex, I agreed! I saw the almost finished show last week, yes there were moments that I wanted to hide behind my hands but all in all….yeah, it’s a show which covers medical, physical, sexual and emotional themes relating to young people; explores some scary teenage traits and all in all is viewer friendly.

I know that there will be people who disagree with me doing therapy on TV, and those who feel teen sex should be kept behind closed doors, and genuinely I can see reasons why people have those responses.

The main decision to do the show involved the opportunity to do therapy on TV. I absolutely believe that there is nothing wrong with talking about our ‘stories’ the events and experiences that formed us, the fears that lie with us and the concerns we have over our actions. This is what excites me in life, the stories we all have to tell. I listen day in and day out to people talking about their journeys, I spend many hours contemplating the benefit of how essential and healthy just being real is! I think everyone should feel ok about their ‘stuff’; it’s the fact that we are told to feel ashamed that makes many of my clients so unhappy in the first place. I want to show the young people who braved the sex advice shop and the viewers at home that talking about our ‘stuff’ is very often the remedy to our fears.

I guess that’s what I want to get out there, a sense that no matter how difficult your journeys have been, the reality is you can build resilience and find better ways to cope with conflict, challenge and criticism.

For my part, I accept that being on TV invites opinion and some of those opinions are pretty nasty…but that’s all they are; opinions, not fact!

Hot like us was a bit of fun for me; a show which involved models in relationships attempting to become ‘Britain’s Hottest Couple’. My job in this series was to do some relationship tests and to try to enforce that perfect looks mean nothing without substance and personality. I really did have fun on this shoot; I didn’t need to be serious and I spent most of my time laughing. I hope those of you who catch it get my sense of humour and don’t take me seriously!

Here I go! Time to start Blogging!

Going to be honest, never done this before, I kind of spend much of my time complaining that we spend far too much time on the computer and other such devices so feel a little hypocritical????
Anyhow, here I am, 38 years old, single mum of two amazing boys, known for my work as a TV psychologist in shows such as The People Watchers, This Morning and as a life columnist for Zest Magazine.
In a couple of weeks I shall be adding a couple of new shows to this list, 'The joy of teenage sex' and 'Hot like us'.
When reading this, forgive my punctuation, I am a statemented dyslexic and whilst i try to understand where a comma or full stop goes, most of the time I fail!
I have been thinking a great deal about resilience of late, this is due to me having had a few knocks recently...Divorce....financial struggles.....realising that I am not 25 and that mini skirts even with thick black tights no longer look ok on a woman of my years.
So, I spent a couple of days mulling over the uncomfortable feelings that I found lurking in the pit of my stomach, ate a fair bit of food, contemplated that the world was all going to end, realised it wouldn’t and boom, got off my ass and started planning!
This blog is part of that plan, and therefore a demonstration of resilience, it’s a small thing I grant you, but it says 'I am making things happen', and that’s the key to resilience....the art, and understanding of agency, i.e. I happen to life, and life doesn't happen to me.
This blog symbolises the start of a new phase for me, and I have BIG plans...BIG, BIG plans! So, whilst this may be a few short paragraphs (whatever paragraphs are), I hope you will join me on my journey!